As parents in the digital age, one of our main tasks is to manage screen time (ours and our children's) in a balanced way. With all the effects screens can have on children – whether it’s television, smartphones, video games, or computers – it’s important to set clear and effective boundaries. How can we do this in a way that creates order and routine for the family without causing ongoing resistance from the kids?
Don't Be Afraid of Screens!
I know there’s a lot of fear out there. “They’ll develop attention problems, lack empathy, lose self-control,” and more. While there’s truth to some of these concerns, screens are here to stay.
Screens are a part of our lives and our children's lives.
They open up a huge, exciting world with limitless possibilities! Instead of fearing them, let's see how we can use screens to build stronger connections with our kids..
The Key Word Is Balance.
Clear household rules will greatly help you maintain balance between various activities. Here are some tips for success:
It’s Important to Set Clear Screen Time Rules
Setting clear rules around screen time provides certainty for kids and helps parents manage the family’s daily routine better. When the rules are clear, children know exactly when and where they’re allowed to use screens, which helps avoid constant negotiations and repeated requests.
It’s crucial to be clear about what you allow, otherwise, in those small moments of uncertainty, kids will keep pushing for more screen time!
When and How to Set the Rules?
One of the most effective ways to set rules is to focus on when and where screen time is allowed, rather than focusing on what’s forbidden. Kids, like adults, don’t enjoy hearing "no" all the time, and it can lead to frustration and arguments. Instead, emphasize the times and places where screen use is positive and fits the family’s routine.
Don’t Forget Flexibility
Flexibility is an important part of managing screen time. As parents, we need to be able to move from one situation to another, adjusting our approach as needed. Flexibility allows us to adapt our routine to the family’s changing needs.
However, it’s essential to remember that flexibility works best after you’ve set clear rules that your kids understand and respect.
Example of Flexibility with Screen Time: If you've set a 30-minute limit for playing video games, use a timer to ensure the time is accurate. Once the kids learn to end their time smoothly and without conflict, you can be more flexible – sometimes extending the time if the day allows for it.
Examples of Screen Time Differences Between Routine and Vacation:
During the school year, screens are limited to weekends, but during vacation, daily use is allowed.
During the regular routine, there are no screens in the morning to allow for getting ready for school, but during vacation, starting the day with a show is okay.
At home, everyone has their own screen, but on vacation, we may need to share because there are fewer devices available.
Alongside Flexibility, Some Rules Should Stay Consistent:
Even during vacation, we choose age-appropriate content for the youngest child.
Whether it's vacation or not, when we need to go out, we get ready first, and screens don’t delay us.
Gradually Returning to Routine
After vacation, it’s important to gradually return to clear screen time limits to ease the transition back to routine. This can be done by gradually reducing screen time each day while reintroducing responsibilities like homework and chores. For example: "Today we'll watch two episodes, tomorrow just one."
Planning these changes requires a prior conversation with the kids, where we share expectations and the upcoming adjustments. Involving children in decision-making helps them feel part of the process and more likely to respect the new rules. For instance, younger children can choose whether to watch TV before or after their snack, while older kids can decide how to use their screen time.
The Most Important Tip – Offer Clear Alternatives to Screen Time. To avoid conflicts, offer the kids a choice between several enjoyable non-screen activities.
Suggested Screen Time Rules for the Home:
During meals, we focus on family time and conversation, no screens allowed.
Only after finishing homework or household chores can kids enjoy screen time.
In the evening, all screens are turned off at a set time, and we enjoy quiet time for reading, conversation, or a family game.
At night, all screens are left out of bedrooms and charged at a central charging station.
After each hour of screen time, we take a break to move around, play, or talk together.
Before watching TV or playing video games, we choose together an outdoor activity or creative project to do afterward.
What are your family’s screen time rules? Let me know!
Ultimately, the right balance between screen time during routine and vacation can help the whole family maintain a healthy daily schedule, even when there's more flexibility during holidays.
Talk soon!
Comments